CANADA RULES, USA DROOLS

If our beloved Montreal Canadiens facing the Washington Capitals is any indication of the two nation’s superiority, yesterday was one of many indications that Canada is a far superior nation than is the U.S. of A. Except for a 5-10 minute period in the second, we dominated offensively (especially when you know who was on the ice), we shut them down defensively (what superb execution) and the goalie did his best impression of the Cristowall. The coaching staff has a plan, and the team implemented the strategy to a “T”. There isn’t much else one has to argue to prove this point, other than pointing out the Ovechkin (the leader for the Maurice Richard Trophy and arguably the most electrifying player in the NHL) was held to two scoring chances through out the game, with only one of them being dangerous.

Now even though gauging the superiority of a nation based on a hockey game is as accurate as starting at an arbitrary location and counting a random number of steps to dig for hidden treasure. But keep in mind that this team, based out of the capital of “the greatest nation in the world” handed out “the greatest bolony contract in the world”. If George McPhee likes taking oversized suppositories this much, he should give Jenna Jameson a call. I hear she’s a leading expert in the field.

To seal the deal and prove my point that Washington doesn't possess the sharpest tools in the shed (George W. does bring down the average quite a bit), one doesn’t have to look far. “Have you ever seen the Washington Monument? It looks NOTHING like the guy! It looks more like a tribute to Bill Clinton!”

Thick…just thick.